Who am I?

 

Hari had come a long way in search of something more than himself. Was he going tp discover something out of this world? Was it going to be something that laid dormant within him? or was this entire journey going to be a huge fiasco? The answer to all of these questions were just a few steps away from him now.

He came face to face with the huge door of the monastery. He could not help but view with an astonished gaze as to the marvellous yet simplistic architecture. There was something soothing yet focussed about the environment there.

Two monks with folded hands and shaved heads greeted him at the entrance and their smile warmed his heart immediately. He wanted to ask them a list of questions but sensing the agitation in his manoeuvre the monks led him straight to their master.

The master sensed a longing for something in his eyes but before Hari could take his first words, the master told him that he should take rest in their guest room that was above. The main of chief part of their conversation could be saved for tomorrow. Hari didn’t seem to object as he had already taken an arduous path to reach here and a good rest would help him gain more clarity.

As he walked into the room, he slowly unpacked his clothes. One of the monks showed him to an outer space where he cleansed himself and had a shower. He returned to the room and sat on a bed that was comfortable but certainly not what he had become accustomed to throughout his life.

He sat there on the bed with only his towel draped around him. He changed into comfortable clothes and removed a photo of a young gorgeous woman from his hover sack. He looked at it and struggled to subdue his tears but put it back again and almost immediately fell into the mystical land of dreams as he put his head on the bed.

Hari was woken up early in the morning by the vibration of the chants below but didn’t want to disturb the solemnity of the place. He took him time and let it all breathe in but his mind kept wandering to different places. He had always felt all over the place, as though he were harbouring many different personalities in him.

That made him more than anxious and the fast life of the city and his previous job as vice president helped put a cover on all of that for a while. As he was getting ready one of he monks finally came upto his room and informed him that the master wanted to meet him.

Once Hari was down, the master greeted him with the utmost respect and a wide smile. “So what brings you here, my son?” Hari took a deep breath but it felt as though he had done so voluntarily after a long time and resumed. “I want to be like the monks who are focussed yet kind people but I lack patience in everything. I have almost backed out of everything that is destined to take a lot of time. Previously I have even made decisions based on raging fits of temper that I wish would never have taken place in the first step.”

At this point the monk asked Hari a simple question which threw him off guard. “Is there anything you think you are good at?” Hari took some time to recollect his thoughts and replied “I am pretty decent at Carrom, some would even say that I had it in me to play at the state level”

The master then called one of his disciples and whispered in his ears. After 10-15 minutes the disciple brought with him a carrom board and coins. He then called out for one of the senior monks to come here and Hari and the senior monk would play together.

The master let them play a few shots to grasp the depth of Hari’s skill when he suddenly announced that the loser of this match would have to pay with death. Hari was now taken aback but having already committed, couldn’t back down.

The senior monk continued the game without any agitation or change in expression. It was soon evident that Hari was raising the bar. He put coin after coin in the pockets with utmost focus and determination. As he neared the end, he for a small second had a smirk but suddenly was hit by something.

Something in his heart that stopped him. He thought too himself that the senior monk was surely a much better person than he had ever been and being responsible for his death would haunt him for the rest of his life. With the queen in sight and the cover also with touching distance.

Hari took his striker and hit the cover without thinking about what would happen next. He intentionally gave it all up and just as the cover was about to head into the pocket the master stopped the coin from travelling as he picked it up in his hands. “No one shall die today!”

The master continued, “You showed immense focus when I said that your life depended on this and there was also compassion and kindness in your heart at the thought of killing another person. You my son have shown that you have what it takes to be a great person, now go out into the world again and never forget this.”

Hari’s eyes had welled up at this moment as no one had ever believed in him so much. He knew from that moment that he had figured out how to live his life.